Today’s my Birthday. I am twenty-seven. I am putting on my special suit and going out for some fun.
Oh yeah.
Bonesteel
This is a wildly important issue that I don’t feel is talked about enough. Nothing kills the mood like having to dig through a thicket of hair to get at the good stuff. The 70’s porno bush look is out for both men and women. You’re fun bits are wonderful and appealing so don’t be afraid to show them off.
Just to reiterate, I am not saying you need to go full on amber alert, just clean it up a bit. Bring some order to the chaos.
Bonesteel
Happy Valentines Day.
Bonesteel
Warning: May Contain Spoilers
Chronicle is about three guys who discover an object, presumed to be extraterrestrial, and develop telekinetic power. Like with all new super powers, things are fun for a while until some d-bag in the group starts to abuse their powers and then must be dealt with by the others.
Chronicle starts off as cliche as cliche can get. Andrew. played by Dane Dahaan, is filming himself in the mirror as he sets up his new video camera. His father then starts pounding on the bedroom door demanding that it be open. Andrew refuses because it’s seven in the morning and his father is already drunk. Then we go to school where he gets bullied by everyone. Then we see how he is picked on in his neighbor hood.
Oh yeah and his mom is dying.
Sigh.
But don’t let this discourage you. It gets better.
Anyway, Andrew is dragged to a party by his cousin Matt, played by Alex Russell, and like with all things Andrew is picked on and ends up outside crying. Matt and Steve, the popular jock played by Micheal B. Jordan, get Andrew because they want him to come and film this weird hole in the ground they are going to explore.
Hole leads to object, object leads to weirdness, weirdness leads to powers.
One of the great things about the documentary style that is being used here is that there doesn’t have to be a lot of time for exposition. It is all assumed to have taken place when the camera turns on and they are experimenting with this new thing they can do.
The movie takes its time letting their new powers develop. They are not able to automatically move cars and fly around. There are also consequences for when they are over taxing themselves. One of the cool things is that as their powers grow it changes how we see the movie because Andrew, the strongest of them, is able to move the camera around with his mind instead of someone always having to hold it. As their world opens up so does ours.
From here on out the movie takes its natural progression. The movie takes enough interesting twists and turns that I don’t want to spoil it least to say that once they start developing their ability the movie gets more engaging.
One of the things that struck me about this movie after I saw it was how one dimensional the characters are. For example there is a romantic plot line between Matt and a girl he went to high school with named Casey, played by Ashley Hinshaw. As their their relationship grows there are multiple references to how Matt was in high school but it’s never really explored. It just hangs there.
The characters are just tropes; the jock, the angry misfit teen, dying mother, angry dad, good-natured friend, bullies, cops, ect, ect. This is not something that hurts the film while you’re watching it but could prevent people from re-watching. Tough despite the lack of character development I still really felt for Andrews character at the end of the movie. I don’t know. It all works I just wish I knew more about the characters.
As for the special affects in this movie I thought they really worked. Nothing seemed to over the top. I thought the movie had the right balance of fantastical things happening with out it seeming to out side the realm of believability. I was never taken out of the movie and for that I was thankful.
I will wrap up by saying this: Chronicle is a cross between Hancock and Cloverfield. The movie is fun, inventive, and wonderfully shot. It’s definitely worth checking out.
Bonesteel
Now that Christmas is behind us how about a movie review of a movie probably out of most theaters and about Christmas. Yay.
Arthur Christmas
The Christmas/Holiday season is the time for the movies to show us the healing power of Christmas. To see how putting aside our petty ways can reveal that which we have been missing and mend the hurt feeling that have been collected along the way. It is a time for our hearts to grow three sizes, not because of heart disease, but because of love.
Arthur Christmas is no exception as it explores the dynasty that is the Santa family who for generations has been delivering presents to children on Christmas Eve so that upon the morn the kids may find exactly what they asked for under the tree. However, instead of an altruistic, heavy set, red nosed man who is delivering presents out of the goodness of his heart, Santa’s organization has become present delivering strike force. This strike force is lead by the elder son Steve, voiced by Hugh Laurie with Santa, voiced by Jim Broadbent, as a doddering old figurehead. All the while Grandsanta, voiced by Bill Nighy, watches from his easy chair and criticizes like all old men do; “in my day we did…”
And ‘Where’s Arthur’ you ask. Well wouldn’t you know he’s in the mailroom answering letters because he’s a head-in-the-clouds accident waiting to happen. Oh Arthur.
Though to be fair the opening of this movie is pretty fantastic as we watch the tactical Elf strike force deliver all the presents and see them navigate their way through problems that occur. The opening also sets up the characters and situation nicely.
The over all arch of the movie is simple in that a child did not get a present delivered to them and there is a ticking clock on when the present can be delivered or else its too late. After seeing the Elf strike force and the S1, Santa’s new “sleigh”, delivering this present to the missed child shouldn’t be an issue, right? Right.
However on this particular Christmas there is an expectation that Santa will retire and hand the reigns over to Steve who is running the show anyway. This does not happen and the jilted elder son points to over all success of the night and claims that the present can’t be delivered. It can but Santa just goes along with what Steve is saying because he’s old and doesn’t understand all the new technology.
Seriously, it’s just that simple. Steve says ‘no’, Santa says ‘awe shucks’ the goes to bed. That’s it.
Needless to say Arthur, voiced by James McAvoy, is devastated that this child will miss out on getting what they asked Santa for Christmas. With some coxing of the Grandsanta, the use of the original sleigh and some reign deer who are descendents of Prancer, Dancer and all them, Arthur is off to deliver the present.
To me this is where the issues begin because the premise is so thin. With the technology displayed this should be an easy fix but what prevents things from moving forward is the personalities at play which for a kids movie puts things on pretty shaky grounds.
In order to draw out the movie there are missteps like Grandsanta mis-reading the map and ending up in Africa where the sleigh is attacked by lions, ending up at the wrong house in Mexico, losing reindeer, Grandsanta’s desire to show everyone else that the old ways were best and, my favorite of all, Santa’s Sleigh being mistaken for an alien space ship.
Yes that is right, there is a plot thread where Santa’s sleigh is mistaken for a spaceship and therefore must be destroyed so everyone can have a good Christmas. It’s not a large plot thread but it’s an annoying one. It’s so impractical, despite how ‘well’ they set it up. I find it hard to believe on Christmas Eve there wouldn’t be one guy in the background saying ‘hey maybe it’s Santa.’
Needless to say that these shenanigans cause lessons to be learned and fences to be mended in the most expected ways possible. The movie really is a family drama based around the changing of who runs the family business which when applied to Santa is really fascinating. However I think the fact that this is done as a kids movie leads to some unfortunate results in terms of drawing out the conflict.
Over all, the movie has a lot of strong laughs, mostly due to Grandsanta, a fantastic opening and a satisfying ending. I think there is enough there for both kids and parents to enjoy and the comic devices to draw out the movie, while painful in places, are bearable enough to sit through.
